Wednesday, February 18, 2009

it's not fun getting married to a lot of people

no, i don't mean being polygamous. in philippine society where families are close and extended families are common, getting married does not always mean getting married to one person. its also 'getting married' to that one person's relatives and family. by 'getting married' i mean you have to as much as possible please the family, be someone that the family would like, open to their comments and suggestions and whatever intervention they want done to your married life. Talk about in-law conflicts. Its more than that.


You can't get away with unsolicited advice which would later sound like they want something about you changed.


now here comes the relatives. coming over to the house without warning. intruding into you private space. meddling into your business like they feel so familiar with everything you're doing and worst -- they'll get into your space and eat up your comfort zone little by little until you feel uncomfortable in your own home. Not to mention the unsolicited advice. Isn't that nice?


In short, they are driving you out of your own space.


Somehow, i never thought i'll get into this kind of common gripe of married women. I never thought i'd feel the same way. When i was a little younger, i thought married life is a bore but it's actually crazy.

When they'd come visit home this April -- i'd probably find my own abode and get out of that messy home. The home they'd messed up.

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